Them Before Us

You probably know the adult viewpoints on marriage, infertility, reproductive technologies, same-sex parenting, divorce, and adoption. But have you ever considered the kids' perspective?

Them Before Us has flipped the script on adult-centric attitudes toward marriage, parenthood, and reproductive technologies by framing these issues around a child's right to be raised by both their mother and father. Set against a backdrop of sound research, the compelling stories throughout each chapter confirm that a child's mental, physical, and emotional well-being depends on being loved by the two people responsible for their existence. It's a paradigm shift that will impact the personal and the political, and reframe every marriage and family conversation across the globe.

Them Before Us dispels many prevalent, harmful myths concerning children's rights, such as:

 • Kids need only love and safety-moms and dads are optional.
 • Love makes a family-biology is irrelevant.
 • Marriage is about adults-it has nothing to do with kids.
 • Children are resilient and will "get over" divorce.
 • Studies show "no difference" in outcomes for kids with same-sex parents.
 • Sperm and egg donor kids are fortunate because they are so wanted.
 • Surrogacy is a great way to help wannabe parents have a baby.
 • Reproductive technologies are just like adoption.